30DWC - DAY 23 - Do as I say, not as I do.

IF and when I do have children, there are some things I want to do differently. Although, I had pretty cool and supportive parents growing up, but still. 

There are some things that I am still trying to figure out that I want my kids to have figured out by now. Idk, this topic is hard for me to think about....I feel like I am just pulling this out of my ass. 

Anyway..

1. I want my kids to be free of self doubt - I want them to own who they are and never hold themselves back. I have held myself back from things my whole life, and it has mainly been because I have such little self confidence and I am always afraid of what other people will think of me. Well, the mother inside of me says "fuck other people"! Don't let anyone or anything stand in the way of what you want to do or who you want to be. A wise quote from Little Miss Sunshine: "Do what you love, and fuck the rest".

2. I want my kids to be independent and think for themselves - I have been way to dependent on my parents for far too long. I never even thought about going away to college or anything like you did because I was comfortable and just wanted to stay home. I had it so so easy growing up. Everything was handed to me. I was the only child, so I was spoiled rotten. And I probably took advantage of that too much. And I feel that I still do to some extent. But I am starting to step out there more and become a real life adult. But, I would like my kids to figure this out sooner. Maybe get a job at 18 like a didn't do. Not wait until they are 25 to have their first job. I still regret that. Not being more independent. I am still figuring it out. I want my kids to have it down by the time they are my age. Somewhat.

3. I don't want my kids to grow up - I know this sounds like it contradicts what I just said. But, whatever, I know you know what I mean. I don't want my kids to grow out of things they love because they feel like they have to and it is time to let those things go. Like having cereal for dinner, watching Disney movies and singing along with the music, blowing bubbles in chocolate milk, playing dress up or make believe, to an extent (hello, your cosplay stuff!!!). I never want them to stop dreaming and playing and being silly. Yes there is a time and a place, but I don't want them to forget that there is ALWAYS a time! A time to be free and funny and childish. To be nostalgic and feel happy when remembering things that you used to love and still carry them in your heart. It's ok to still laugh at fart jokes, it's ok to have chocolate cake for breakfast sometimes. It's ok that I am 26 and I still want to build forts. It's ok to still be a kid.

- Cobb