Typical Blogger Hiatus.

Bow-Shut up...

Alright my wisdom toothless, child teaching, badass sailing (not really), stupid, ugly poop friend, its time to get back in our groove of bloodiness (i typed "blogginess ", but i'm gonna leave it. haha!).

I have no stinkin clue what week it would be, so, this wan be random week. Randomness number one, i am watching Everybody Loves Raymond!

Sad thing about this right now is that i have nothing to talk about. So. without further ado, here are the next 20 things that pop in my head....no hesitation.....ready? GO!

1. Goose is a funny word.
2. Move is a funny word.
3.Bananas are yellow and they are gross.
4. I typed $ instead of $ at first.
5. My arms are falling asleep. I'll leave the reason to your imagination. ha!
6. Twenty is a long ways off. ugh.
7. Fruit punch...i want some.
8. And i want some oreos.
9. This is like Grace's stream of conshhhhhnious.
10. I hope you have a good week and that your teeth dont act like bitches.
11. I have nothing to say for number 11.
12. 11 looks like two sticks...with flags at the top..
13. 13!!
14. I wanna see so many movies right now.
15. Why dont they make fudge flavored salad?
16. 15....Dafuq?!
17. My phone just went off. Wonder who is communicating with me.
18. It was Amber! She said "I. Love. Titus" which i thought was "I love tits" at first. Honest mistake.
19. erunrtvibtvinluernpvuentuebpuenvpoeunvpuvbepigwbg
20. Words i found in the above nonsense: run,poe,pig,wig,uno,vent,lube,tube,beep,pen,.....done.

DONE!
CYAL8TAH!

Surprise New Year Post!

Oh hai! Can you guess what today is? No. Shut up. It's January 4th. That means it's closing in on the day when everyone's New Year's resolution goes down the proverbial crapper!

Pictured: your hopes and dreams

You see, the problem with "resolving" to do things for the new year is that there's basically nothing to keep us accountable. The other (and less finger-pointy) problem is that we choose difficult resolutions.

Scott gets it.

Here is my proposal for better resolution-keeping: make keep-able resolutions! Duh! You'd like some examples? GREAT! I happen to have some lined up! 

1. Clean my apartment...... once. Self-explanatory. (BONUS: Learn how to spell "explanatory" so I don't have to spell-check it each time I use it.) 
2. Consume over 2,000 calories in one meal at least twice a year. I mean, who doesn't love a Big Mac meal?
3. Tell myself I'll stop spending money. Go to Barnes and Noble the next day and buy a $20 journal I'll forget to write in. I'll think the journal's so pretty that I must find something meaningful to write in it, but I have nothing meaningful to say. So, it sits with my other journals while I wish I was a Bronte sister. (BONUS: Fix the syntax of that sentence.)
4. Exercise whenever I freaking feel like it. Because sometimes I do. Gotta listen to that body!
5. Spend a whole Saturday on the couch. Done.
6. Forget to buy paper towels, thus leaving the kitchen counters dirty for one more week. (BONUS: Go to the store specifically for paper towels and forget to buy them again.)
7. Watch one-too-many episodes of Buffy on Netflix and wonder why I know nothing of current events. What's politics?
8. Take at least one relaxing bath with bubbles. After all that Buffy-watching and food-eating, I might get stressed out.
9. Drink, like, five cups of coffee before 10 am. Thentypelikethewindbecasecaffeine!!!!!
10. Continue cursing. Dammit.

There you have it! I am 100% positive that I can an will accomplish every item on that list in 2014. I am a winner. 

Motto.

- Bowman